But this I say, brethren, the time is short, so that from now on even those who have wives should be as though they had none, For the form of this world is passing way. [1 Cor 7:27-31] What does this mean?
———————————————-
The following scriptures setup the context for a few thoughts about marriage.
Many therefore of his disciples, when they had heard this, said, This is a hard saying; who can hear it? [John 6:60]
…Jesus answered and said to them, “You are mistaken, not knowing the Scriptures nor the power of God. “For in the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage, but are like angels of God in heaven. [Matt 22:25-30]
…and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake. He who is able to accept it, let him accept it.” [Matt 19:9-12]
Now concerning the things whereof you wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. [1 Cor 7:1-2]
But this I say, brethren, the time is short, so that from now on even those who have wives should be as though they had none, For the form of this world is passing away. [1 Cor 7:27-31]
—————–
Some of Jesus’ (and Paul’s) sayings are difficult to understand. Some of them, however, because of our flesh, are just plain difficult to accept and to put in practice. Jesus said there are some who are celibate for the Kingdom of God. Paul said that those who had wives should be as though they had none. There doesn’t seem to be much (if any) preaching on these scriptures.
We are to love each other with agape (God’s) love. Having been married for 32 years, I can see the progression of God’s redemptive spirit slowly changing me. Although I had been a Christian for more than five years before my second marriage, I started this marriage full of the ways of the world and the old nature was little mortified.
God’s love has nothing to do with how my spouse makes or doesn’t make me feel. It has nothing to do with how she fulfills my desires or needs. Rather, it has to do with living for another motive–for the higher calling of loving in the love of God. It has God as the purpose for marriage and the center of attention–not me or my wife or even “us” (our relationship). Our relationship is not the motive, the focus, or the reason for our marriage.
…And God said, It is not good that man is alone. I will make him a helper comparable to him. [Gen 2:18]
It is commonly accepted that companionship is the primary reason for marriage, and the above verse declares this. Marriage is thus viewed as the answer to loneliness. We marry so that we will not be alone. Included in companionship are such things as pleasure, attraction, affection, love, and fulfillment. These are earthly-oriented, human-oriented needs which are ours to experience and to enjoy completely. However, there are some pitfalls regarding this approach. For example, a lonely, insecure woman might be driven to marry out of desperation. The fear of loneliness drives her to marry the first person that comes along who shows her any attention. A person in such a state is apt to make the wrong choice. Thus, the desire to overcome loneliness is not, in itself, the most reliable motive.
Is there a higher motive, a better motive, a heavenly motive? Might we take it a step further? Companionship is a means to an end; it is not the end itself. It is not the primary reason God created marriage. The primary reason for marriage is that it is God’s design and, therefore, for his purpose.
“You are worthy, O Lord, to receive glory and honor and power; for You created all things, and by Your will [for your pleasure KJV] they exist and were created.” [Rev 4:11]
All things that are made are made for His glory. God made us for His glory. Thus, marriage and all elements of marriage such as companionship are firstly for His purpose, design, and glory.
I will say to the north, ‘Give them up!’ And to the south, ‘Do not keep them back!’ Bring My sons from afar, and My daughters from the ends of the earth. Everyone who is called by My name, whom I have created for My glory; I have formed him (her), yes, I have made him.” [Isa 43:6-7] (Emphasis added)
As a side note, some men believe that woman (our spouse) was created to meet “my” needs. Genesis 2:18 is used (in a roundabout fashion) to support such a view. Woman, however, was created–not for man’s pleasure–but for God’s glory.
What are the implications of the verse where Jesus says, “in the resurrection they neither marry or are given in marriage”? (Matt 22:25-30) We may surmise from this verse that in heaven we will not have the legal and moral responsibilities of a marriage relationship. We will not have the desires and passions of this life. It might even be that we won’t have a gender identity. We shall not have corrupt flesh as we now have, and our spouses will be free of the desires and obligations they experience here on earth. My wife will not be bound to me, and I will not be bound to her. In heaven, each will be bound exclusively to Christ and corporately we will be bound by pure love energizing every one. We will have no need or desire for exclusive relationships in heaven.
Scripture says, “Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband” [1 Cor 7:2] However, it won’t be so in heaven. Paul directs us to this heavenly love for our spouse even while we are yet upon the earth. The scripture says if you can’t control (or sublimate) your passions and desires, then get married. Even so, Paul directs us to make God the focus of our marriage.
But I want you to be without care. He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord– how he may please the Lord. But he who is married cares about the things of the world– how he may please his wife. There is a difference between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world– how she may please her husband. [1 Cor 7:32-34].
He who marries cares for this world and how he can please his wife. Likewise, the woman who marries does not live a life exclusively devoted to Christ but to her spouse, and how she may please him. Single people are free to be totally devoted to Christ and how they may please him. Even so, he who has a wife is to live as though he has none. [1 Cor 7:9] What does this mean?
God created everything for his own purpose, glory, and pleasure. We do the same thing. Anything we make is made, not for the thing’s sake, but for our sake. For example, a chair does not exist for itself; it exists for its maker. Likewise, we exist for our maker’s purpose. The purpose of marriage is the same purpose of everything else–to glorify God. Somewhere along the line, the married couple must see that the purpose for their marriage is the Kingdom of God. Each mate must give the other the liberty, and should encourage each other, to turn to Christ and to set their heart on the things of heaven. Will such a view turn us into sterile, antiseptic nuns and monks–repressing the natural, the normal, the human? Or, will it cause us to align with what is going on in the spirit realm, in the heavenly realm, in the Kingdom of God? I believe it is the latter. It does not mean that we abstain from romantic and sexual intimacy or from any other aspect of our marriage relationship. If we put the Kingdom of God first in our marriage, the other things we need and desire will follow. They will have there proper place, order, and expression. [Matt 6:33]
. . . and yet I show you a more excellent way. 1 Cor 12:31
Assuming you were both believers, do you recall that, before you married, your spouse was first your sister or brother? What is the higher calling–that which is eternal or that which is temporal? Well then, we shall not always be husband and wife, but we shall always be brother and sister (or the heavenly equivalent).
Do not many couples, after years (or perhaps …months) of marriage, begin to take each other for granted? What does that mean except that we downgrade one another? We are less in each other’s eyes than during our courtship. Yet, we were only brother and sister during the time of dating, engagement, or courtship. If marriage is a more exalted state, how can it be that we downgrade each other, take each other for granted, and treat each other with less respect and love then when we were merely brother and sister in the Lord? How is it that, having first been brother and sister, we become husband and wife and lose (or forfeit) that brotherly-sisterly relationship? Are we not still brother and sister in the Lord? [1 Cor: 9:5] [1]Not only that but, if we divorce (God forbid), are we not still brother and sister? Therefore, the brother-sister relationship is paramount (superior) in this earthly life too and not only in the next.
It is with this eternal perspective that Paul admonishes us to live our married lives. Certainly, we are to be companions–bonded into one flesh–in this life, but to what end?
She is my helpmate. For what? To fulfill my kingdom? …Or to fulfill God’s?
[1] 1 Cor.9:5 Have we not power to lead about a sister, a wife, as well as other apostles, and as the brethren of the Lord, and Cephas? (KJV) According to Strong’s concordance, the word “sister” is in the text. The NIV and the NKJV omit it. However, my NKJV study Bible states in the center column reference that the literal translation, in fact, does contain the word sister.
